I remember engaging in conversation a few years ago with a friend regarding the concept of Father choosing a mate for us--arranged marriage. The idea put forth by my friend was "God lets us make our own choices for a mate. Then, we offer the choice up to Him for blessing. God would never make that choice for me".
The purpose of my comments is not to criticize the free choice we have truly been given by Adonai. Personal choices are great but, sadly, perpetually continue on or end in bitter disappointment far more times than joyous adventures. My purpose is to show a much better choice through Scripture, and back it up with personal testimony.
My response to my friend's statement was, "God lets us make our own choices. So, my choice is His choice"--a conclusion arrived at through bitter experience. Both my friend and I had made marital choices in line with the former position. Both ended with hurt and disappointment.
When I left Arizona alone for Texas, I had one purpose in mind---follow the purity of Adonai no matter what the cost. For, it is Messiah that said in Luke 14: 26, "If anyone comes to Me and does not hate (love less than YHVH) his...wife and children...yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple". In contrast to my friend, I chose the purity of YHVH's Word. Whether or not He gave me another mate, it would be His choice. And, the lady He would choose would be "(equally) yoked" with me, and I with her.
In the spirit of being "(equally) yoked", Abraham said to Eiezer "...go to my country and to my family, and take a wife for my son Isaac", (Gen. 24: 4). It is made clear in v. 6 Isaac had no choice in the matter. For, Abraham tells Eliezer, "Beware that you do no take my son back there". By virtue of his delegation to Eliezer, the matter didn't even reside in the purview of Abraham.
Then in v. 12, this wise servant expresses trust in YHVH to "give (him) success". In v. 14, Eliezer displays the depth of his wisdom by deferring the daunting choice of wife to YHVH Himself. His faithful act is only a continuance of his unswerving trust in the prophesy of his master in v. 7. Abraham had said, "He (YHVH) will send His angel (Yeshua) before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there".
My personal testimony parallels in its own way and support Abraham allowing Father to choose a mate for Isaac (or for us), and is seen through the person of Sarah. After several months of living in Texas, I began to embrace the idea of living single. Yet, Father had different ideas that my weak faith couldn't grasp at the time.
During that summer, I had begun a string of musical sequels, now totaling 25 songs recorded on three albums. Through various objects or persons of inspiration, I took on the task of taking popular secular tunes and changing the lyrics to present a Messianic Gospel theme, without altering the integrity of the original song.
Unknown to me at the time, one of those persons of inspiration would become Father's choice of mate, for both her and I. By early fall, Father had caused both of us to notice and consider the other. Even so, we were far from being a mutual choice of mate. Actually, we never fell in love until after our acceptance of Father's choice.
Acting upon a several year old prophesy that Father would be sending her a husband, SueJean threw out a fleece similar to Eliezer's in 24: 14. Just between her and Father she said, "If this man (DannyLee) is the one You want for me, let him write me a song".
To the tune of "Peaceful Easy Feeling", that song is the title song of my "On Holy Ground" album. Father took two people that would likely not have personally chosen the other and put HIS stamp of approval upon their union, just like He did with Isaac and Rebecka.
I believe the personal qualities ascribed to Sarah by the sages show contrast and comparison between SueJean, a virtuous woman of Proverbs 31, and the unrighteous. I have heard is said, "beauty is only skin deep". For the unrighteous, this is certainly true. For the virtuous, outward beauty continues to the very heart and soul.
As opposed to the beauty of outward appearance and adornment, it is a beauty described by Peter in 3: 4 of his first epistle. "Rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of YHVH".
It is written in 1 Corinthians 11: 3, "But I want you to know that the head of every man is Messiah, the head of woman is man, and the head of Messiah is YHVH". This is a concept almost totally alien to our society and virtually demonized by all of Christianity.
There are NO "yes, buts". Peter continues in 3: 5-6 of his first epistle, "...being submissive to your husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord". As with Sarah and Rebecka, wisdom and innocence seen in Father's choice for me is described in Proverbs 31: 26. "She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness." It is SueJean's wise kindness that many times keeps this sometimes crude cowboy honest.
Herein lies the contrast and irony. With kindness, a Godly wife will respect and reverence the headship of her husband. An unrighteous wife will subvert her husband's headship no matter how good he is. A Godly husband will "love his wife as Messiah loved (us)". An unrighteous husband will likely be a "brute" regardless of a wife's gracious efforts.
The irony is, at one point in the months before leaving Arizona, I mused in my mind that if I was going to be blessed with a Godly wife, Father might have to bring her from the other side of the planet. Hmm ... Thailand to Texas ... anyone got a globe handy? I'll let SueJean talk about that one. Her story about us can be read by clicking here. Have a terrifically encouraging Son-shine day in Messiah!
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